No Exit: Being trapped first in a Red Cross Shelter and eventually a private home Christmas Eve and Christmas Night 1981
Every year around Christmas Eve, I think back to our ill-fated night in a Red Cross Shelter in Northeast Pennsylvania. We were traveling to Manlius, New York (a small village outside Syracuse, New York) to spend Christmas with my wife’s (then girlfriend’s) parents and her 2 brothers traveling from California, and 2 sister’s traveling from nearby in upstate New York and Hartford, Connecticut. The two sisters made it; the rest of us did not.
At that time, I believed the difference between tragedy and comedy is the benefit of time (rather than mindset) and this remains true today in this instance. I can now laugh as I hope you will too, at our then seemingly tragic circumstance.
At the time, we lived on a 47-acre property of mostly steep hills in West Virginia. We lovingly fixed up a garage with loft into our small living place with only wood stove for heating and neighbors who lived on the property who also heated with wood who offered to keep the fire burning while we left.
Prior to our leaving I remember my Dad called to ask if I had checked the weather report before embarking on our journey. I lied and said I did to appease him; too young (or stupid) to appreciate his wise advice or concern for my safety.
We left with a front wheel drive Toyota Tercel with 13-inch tires and as we neared the New York State Thruway, we encountered 20 degree below zero wind chill and snow drifts as high as the interstate sign number from lake effect snow. I remember suggesting to my now wife that we stop and spend the night in a motel but she said that we could not as we were supposed to stop in Rochester along with way to pick up her brother and his girlfriend. I learned then of my future wife’s fearlessness and loyalty to her family and perhaps sense of duty.
My desire to find a motel speaks to the direness of the situation, as I would not typically want to stay in a motel unless the proverbial hell freezes over which is how it seemed to me at the time. When we arrived at the entrance to the New York State Thruway we were informed that the road was closed, as was the one we had been driving on for quite some time. When I asked where the nearest motel was, I was informed that all motels were booked and the nearest place to stay was a Red Cross Shelter in Northeast, Pennsylvania.
We were given adjoining cots on a gym floor along with many other weary souls. I do recall the seeming highlight of Christmas day being at the time walking to a convenience store that was opened up in our honor to buy some junk food to celebrate the day. That was far better than our dinner of turkey gravy without the turkey but outdone by a stranger approaching us that evening to ask if we would like to come to her home to sleep that night. Would we!
My being overjoyed soon turned to dismay when we were offered separate rooms in separate beds and I learned that our personal savior was in fact a born-again Christian who was fated (she believed) to save my Jewish soul. The next morning I was determined to split and embark again via an alternative route as the New York State Thruway was still closed. The women’s son worked at Domino’s and was able to get our car to start when I failed.
I cannot express the feeling of relief to be out of her home and on the road again. Shortly after we left, we encountered a car stuck in the snow, which temporarily derailed our escape but do not underestimate my now wife’s determination and will. All siblings were united the day after Christmas with our various horror stories to share. Nothing else stands out from that season.
Upon our return home, we learned that it was impossible to maintain two fires in such cold weather and we returned to frozen pipes and the tragedy that it brought upon us.
Today, my daughter who works with Covid-19 patients in a hospital was supposed to arrive and not leave until the day after her mother’s birthday on December 29th. We postponed our visit and she will be alone for Christmas although we are looking forward to a zoom call tomorrow evening with my two children and my son’s wife.
I am hopeful that our call will be memorable and that one-day soon I can look back on the year of the pandemic with comfort and joy after it is over.
Choose Joy- Buskin and Batteau
CHOOSE JOY
WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING
YOU ALWAYS GET A CHOICE
TO GET UP ON THE RIGHT SIDE OR THE WRONG SIDE OF THE BED
YOU GET TO PICK YOUR MOVIE
TO REGRET OR TO REJOICE
YOUR SELECTION’S A PROJECTION OF THE STORY IN YOUR HEAD
LIKE MY UNCLE USED TO SAY
CHOOSE JOY
HE LIVED HIS LIFE THAT WAY
CHOOSE JOY
PUT YOUR HEART IN EVERYTHING
AND NEVER MISS A CHANCE TO SING
YO CANTO POR LO TANTO SOY (I sing, therefore I am)
CHOOSE JOY CHOOSE JOY CHOOSE JOY CHOOSE JOY
